I've had so much experience with narcissism, gas lighting, manipulation, and passive aggressive behavior. And luckily I have moved out of that phase of life where I am unable to see it and take the blame on all myself, to being able to clearly see the illusions.
Yet I still have moments I am confronted with the behavior, words, and actions of others, and my heart deeply cries over it.
A dear friend reminded me; it is in the pause of these moments that we heal and grow from our past.
And I step back into my knowingness...my breath...my being. I feel the feelings I need to feel: the anger, the frustration, the sadness, the grief, the pain... I cry and allow it all to come tumbling out of me. But it is in these moments that I do not respond. I do not engage. I pause knowing fully my truth. There is no need to defend, attack, or argue. I know how others treat me, speak to me, and react to me is simply their own sh*t they haven't yet unpacked.
And as I cry and grieve, I am able to forgive, and have compassion, and remember this wisdom.
My wish for you is to come back to this rememberance...to this ancient wisdom. To realize other's actions are simply a reflection of their own inner struggle and turmoil, and have compassion for their Souls. To fully BE in these moments. To feel fully. To pause and breathe.
If we fail to allow ourselves to feel, and just react, we miss the lesson. We miss the growth. We miss the opportunity to see from a clear and unclouded picture. And we burry the hurt and pain deep within our hearts, and without even realizing, begin building up walls around it.
It is extremely difficult to unpack all the baggage...all the layers we have built up throughout the years. From this lifetime. From past lifetimes. From our ancestral lines. It's a lot of sh*t to unpack, and this can be extremely uncomfortable for many, many people here. For some, it is much more comfortable to claim victim, or stay in these patterns that feel comfortable. Change is scary. The unknown is scary. And for some, they may be playing these roles to help us continually evolve and grow.
But the most beautiful gift we have is this very knowing that we have the power and ability to heal ourselves and release the chains that prevent us from being fully, authentically, unapologetically our Selves in this ever changing world.
So when we pause, we are able to allow the emotions to flow through and out of us like a river. We understand our human Self and role here on Earth. There is no need for struggle. Just a deep surrendering to the process of life.
Not living your full truth...your very essence. Not allowing the world to fully see your light in all its brilliant beauty...that is scariest of all.
Show up for yourselves. Do the necessary work to heal deep trauma. When you are faced wit
h these situations you've healed from, see them for what they are. Grieve them. Feel all you need to feel. And pause...connect to your breath...connect to yourself...surrender....and carry on shining your light.
Much love and many many blessings to you.